Oct 29

Oct 29 Refining My Character

I am a quarter of a century years old now! Turning 25 signifies a new season for me because I’m more focused on refining my character. Refining my character is the process of becoming the best possible version of myself; being original. Through various life changes and shifts in relationships, I had to take self-inventory. My motivation used to be about getting ahead, meeting my goals and making enough money to live the comfortable life that I think I deserve.

This year I’m focused on unlearning unhealthy behaviors, stepping out of my comfort zone and building healthy boundaries. I want to stop picking up other people’s problems, especially with family. I want to stop worrying about my future because God is in control. I will focus on loving those who love me back and letting go of the people and things that are not meant for me. I will walk in confidence and boldness in every aspect of my life. And I will grind in silence until I reach my personal goals.

Here are 3 questions I have asked myself as I refine my character:

1. How do I act when I’m under pressure?

When life put’s pressure on you, your true character will show. When I get under a lot of pressure, I get tough and critical. My criticism not only affects those around me but manifests in negative self-talk which breeds more misguided “work hard” behavior. To combat that, I am paying attention to my maladaptive behaviors and working to change them.

2. How do I define myself?

I typically define myself by what I do and what I have accomplished. But, my experience in grad school has taught me that degrees and titles do not make you a better person. This year, I want to build my identity on who God says I am and not on what my accomplishments say I am.

3. What patterns do I see in my life?

Pay attention to the re-occurring themes in your life. I noticed a pattern in my relationships that I actively had to change. My way of changing this was by building better boundaries. I’m also working on unlearning unhealthy behaviors and thought patterns.

Year 25 is going to be my best year yet, I can just feel it. In preparation for all this amazing year, I am making sure that I have a strong enough character to handle the blessings and victories that I am believing God for. I recommend that you create a list of questions that challenge you to evaluate your character and work on it. Also, Thank you for all the birthday wishes.