Don't Settle For Safe
I wasn’t able to attend the Woman Evolve Conference in Colorado this year so I decided to get one of Sarah Jakes Roberts books instead. I really enjoyed reading this book because Sarah focused on empowering women through transparency, biblical truths and direct conviction. There were parts of this book that read me and checked me, but I needed it! In this book, Sarah reminds women not to settle for what is safe and comfortable for us because it stifles our growth and limits our potential.
Don’t Make Excuses
In the first two chapters, Sarah talked about the importance of learning from our childhood failures and channeling our insecurities into empowerment, to maximize adulthood. She was transparent about becoming a teenage mom in a very judgmental environment and how her pregnancy was an unexpected event that delayed her desired accomplishments. She emphasized that the basic markers of “success” in society like graduating, getting married, or having a career, take a lot of work.
“The bridge from who you once were to who God ordained for you to be is created from bricks of vulnerability, humility and a master plan so perfect, even the things that once hurt you will serve in making you better. ”
I could totally relate and I appreciated how she acknowledged the reality of lifes “raging storms” causing detours in our plans. In light of these challenges, Sarah encourages readers to make a plan and resist the urge to lower your expectations. She challenges us to guard our hearts, make good decisions and keep our promises to ourselves.
Learn Your Pattern
In the next two chapters, Sarah talked about knowing your pattern of behavior and addressing the ones that are self-sabotaging. This includes recognizing fear based decisions, or playing victim or avoiding the lessons from your past mistakes. The patterns she says, will determine the difference between destruction or construction. However, the beauty in having a relationship with God is that he will fill the holes in your life that have made you feel empty. This naturally leads into knowing your roots and having the courage to dig deep into your history and family positions.
“You must be willing to ask yourself if you’re making a decision from a place of fear and insecurity or from the strength necessary to maintain your esteem.”
Purpose
I’m going to summarize the remaining chapters because I believe they all point to finding purpose. In the chapter called frenemies, Sarah talked about how the people in your life are a reflection of you and when you begin to evolve, you have to let go of some friends.
“When a person is committed to only one version of who you are, your evolution will create relationship tension.”
Friendships should be a shelter that protects you from storms and should make you feel humbled and empowered. There is a loneliness that comes with being different but if you do not embrace that with the proper mindset, you will resent your unique qualities. Being this process by being transparent and open in your friendship and the people in your life will reflect that.
“God never takes away anything from us that he doesn’t return with interest.”
Next, she discusses forgiveness and how people hurt us because we have an expectation of them that was rooted in our desires but not in reality. Forgiveness is necessary because we cannot compartmentalize our hurt. And as we forgive others, we forgive ourselves and we are more receptive of Gods love. In the chapter about Connecting with God, Sarah encouraged readers to stop wondering why God loves us but rather enjoy the fact that he does love us. This all leads to us finding out God ordained purpose and destiny.
I really enjoyed reading this book and I highly recommend it for young women learning to set new goals and step out of their comfort zones.
